Ready: prepared mentally or physically for some experience or action
This… was not the plan. At all. I’m off script and full on improving right now. Like, I’m still kind of reeling from it, so let me try rewinding to the beginning – also known as two weeks ago.
See, I had reflective energy. I was thinking about how I lived in January and how I wanted to build momentum I could carry through the rest of 2019. I’ve said it before, January is the easiest time to stick with your goals. I wanted to be mindful of my own behaviors and practicing what I preach. To do this, I decided I wanted to focus on opportunities to manifest in 2020.
One of those opportunities was a coaching retreat.
Ever since I’ve gotten into the blogger/influencer space, I’ve been longing for meet ups. I’ve wanted nothing more than to be surrounded by like-minded women with goals similar to my own. I’ve been to one and absolutely loved it, but meetups near me are either during the work day, a pain in the ass to get to, or too difficult to make work with my schedule.
This desire has shifted to retreats ever since I discovered the coaching space. I’ve spent days in my office fantasizing of escaping my routine for a few days in a beautiful, green place, surrounded by strong, universe-minded women, who are looking for something more.
This desire comes in two parts: I want the nourishment for my soul and the knowledge of the women I’d be around.
So why do I want to go on a retreat in 2020?
I want to be a life coach, but, like, I don’t know much about it. The extent of my knowledge comes from podcasts, the Spirit Junkie Masterclass, and life experience. I have my client zero, but this is a saintly friend who is being my guinea pig. (Thank you so much bby xx)
I have fear around my knowledge and abilities to be an actual coach who charges people actual money. I don’t want to be some ragtag, know-nothing coach who takes people’s money and hands back garbage. I felt a coaching retreat would get me around other coaches and build my confidence.
I did some Googling but didn’t come up with much, so I reached out to my classmates in the Spirit Junkie Facebook group. I made a post stating I had a goal to go on a retreat in 2020 that was spiritual and practical – what retreats did they know of?
I got a few suggestions, including one from a lovely lady named Aly Wilkins, who shared a link to her retreat in a few months.
Y’all, this retreat sounds like exactly what I want, but I was honestly hung up on it being so short notice. I couldn’t possibly make it work with what was going on in my life or gather the proper funds in time. I went back and forth with Aly about retreats she’s hosting in the future, but this one felt right. This retreat is offering exactly what I was looking for in every sense; the only thing holding me back was me.
This is one of my faults: I live for the plan and not the execution. I had no actual reason to say no to this retreat other than my own hesitation.
It felt like a challenge from the universe: I can have the opportunity I desire, but I’m not allowed to wait; it’s right in front of me, and it’s my own choice not to take it.
I scheduled a virtual coffee date with Aly for us to discuss the details of the retreat and her coaching prices. I’ve wanted a coach for quite some time, but I’ve always considered it out of my budget. I didn’t think I’d be able to find a coach that was the perfect mix of spiritual and practical I wanted, but Aly appeared to be it. I didn’t want to get ahead of myself, but I didn’t think it would hurt to ask her price.
Our call was 2:00 p.m. the coming Saturday. My hair was wet in twist-braid low buns, and I wore my new, pink denim jacket. It was pouring rain outside. I didn’t know what to expect or what to prepare for with this call.
I wasn’t scared or excited. I can best described it as ready. I don’t know what I was ready for, but I was ready to take the call.
Aly was easy to talk to. We talked about what I’m looking for and where I’m at in life. How nothing is wrong, but I’m so unhappy with the way my life is. How I feel like my passion, soul, and fire diminish each time I walk into my warehouse office. How I have no doubt about what I’m supposed to be doing, but I don’t know how to do it.
She wanted to work with me. We discussed the retreat and coaching. I was hesitant with the price of the retreat alone, and adding six weeks of coaching made it an even prettier penny. I didn’t totally have the funds, but… I went for it.
I’ve spent plenty of time and money trying to make things work on my own, but I need help. I need someone to guide me and help me navigate all the elements of starting a business. It was a huge fucking decision, but I don’t doubt it at all. This is exactly what I’m supposed to do right now.
I’ve cycled through a lot of bad emotions. I had fear the opportunity would be taken away, something terrible would happen, I’m not actually ready, I won’t be able to do it, or I’ll fail, but only beautiful things have come from it. None of my fears have materialized yet, and pieces of my world have suddenly clicked.
I asked the universe for something, and it gave it to me because I’m ready.